Radical conservatives calling people ‘libtards’
Radical liberals burning buildings on college campuses
Radical conservatives saying conservatives never burned buildings, while conveniently ignoring the shootings and bombings at abortion clinics
Radical liberals calling for a military coup
Radical religious saying they will do ANYTHING to get to heaven
Radical religious saying they know who will get to heaven (and who won’t)
High image advertising that presents no useful information (‘Hello Moto’)
TV ads that flash through images faster than eyes can capture (subliminal advertising works, or they wouldn’t use it . . . and throw in the ‘getting old’ factor)
The Merry Minuet
1959 The Kingston Trio Words and Music by Sheldon Harnick
There’s rioting in Africa, (whistling)
There’s starving in Spain, (whistling)
There’s hurricanes in Flo-ri-da, (whistling)
And Texas needs rain. (off-key)
The whole world is festering with unhappy souls.
The French hate the Germans,
the Germans hate the Poles.
Italians hate Yugoslavs, South Africans hate the Dutch.
AND I DON’T LIKE ANYONE MUCH!
But we can be tranquil and thankful and calm,
For this is America, and we’ve got the bomb,
And we know for certain that some lovely day
Someone will push the button,
AND WE WILL ALL BE BLOWN AWAY!
There’s rioting in Africa (whistling)
There’s strife in Iran.
What nature doesn’t do to us
Will be done by our fellow man. (‘man’ off-key)
Regulations full of loopholes only the rich can use
Public financing of private enterprises (banks, ballparks, abortion clinics, to name a few)
Facebookers who share posts that use words like ‘libtard’
Facebookers who hate the Packers, Vikings, Patriots, Yankees or any other sports team
Smart, dynamic and caring young people who apply their passion and intellect to one of the least significant issues of our times – school mascots
People who deny science, and also deny common sense (‘back then we had way more snow, and colder weather for much longer periods, but global warming is a hoax’)
People who go to an event, then watch it through their cell phones
Putin, both Clintons, Trump – and Martha Stewart for good measure
“All you holy men and women, pray for us.”
Catholic Litany of the Saints